ps i may or may not be wearing a sequined bra
You don't need id to drink rum in an alley.
marching band practice is quite the interesting soundtrack to sex
So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
i just farted in a meeting....took me completely by surprise.
so you made the shocked face and they caught you.
yup.
he's having a long distance Facebook-coordinated power hour. the status update has 159 comments ...
Lets start the night off early. Those Coronas arent going to throw themselves up.
Just got my period. This just makes my beach escapade totally even that much more ok.
He probably has his cowboy hat on, that's his house hat.
But apparently I got kicked in the head by a stripper at some point
Oh my fucking god I saw the pictures. What the mother fucking fuck. Destroy the pictures. Destroy the fucking pictures.
Please confirm the destruction of the pictures. NOW.
If I was a guy I'd keep a condom in my pocket, in my wallet, in my backpack, in my car, in my shoe, behind my fucking ear
I have done everything sexualally imaginable with that umpalumpa
I NEED A MOM FRIEND. NOW.
The high school classes are online, not my sex life. He still comes over for “teacher / parent conferences.” A couple more “conferences” and I’ll be able to rewrite the Sex Ed curriculum
Randomize