I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
I'm in a strip club that reminds me of a crack house from the 80's.
Ugh I just know that when I take off his pants his underwear will have Megan's Law written all over them.
Update: no underwear. Greeeeen light.
giving him head while hes talking to his fiancee on the phone about inviting me to their wedding.... im invited. should i go or would that be wrong?
I think his glow in the dark Star Wars sheets, at the time, really turned me on.
It's never good when you wake up covered with burns
We eventually get in a cab (after david tried to hail multiple regular cars and some sort of shuttle bus)
No more cocaine. I spent two hours in my bathroom convincing myself I was ugly. Is this what a period feels like?
You're the worst gay friend ever.
Can we make a pact that if we're 40 and still sluts that aren't married we can get civil unioned the fuck up and raise an asian baby as our own?
Just walked into the library with a case of Strawberitas in hand.. no one said a word.. I think they were just impressed I knew where the library was
A guy claiming to be the Japanese counterpart to the White Power Ranger is trying to take me home....
Is a swingers hotel appropriate for an anniversary?
i swear to god it was like we were fucking in 9 dimensions
You're emotionally mature, right? I said you were.
I have at least four things in my line of sight that have Kermit the Frog on them in my dorm. Does that answer your question?
THERE'S MORE TO LIFE THAN JUST MISSIONARY
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