Kiss
Puke
It was like doing yoga with his dick in me
You need to come back and get me. This is not a jersey shore party and he is not dressed as Pauly D and I am about one shot away from hooking up with a real fist pumping Guido.
Fuck him tonight for the both of us. We're still tag-teaming in spirit.
Went to the doctor's today. The lady took one look at my throat and said "oh god"
Too much penis in there.
The cops raided her house the day before class even started
Those assholes are becoming so efficient
The strip clubs here are like a safari of penis, and I'm gonna bag me a rhino.
I believe in using alcohol to heal from the inside. Not as a topical solution.
This is what happens when you leave: I get all vulnerable and I make out with the cowboy to shut him up about Jesus.
Just convinced a housekeeper at work to set up her 401k. Gotta start hittin the gb every morning before work. Happy 420
If a treadmill opens up I'll run next to him and then fall off so he has to give me mouth to mouth
It's not even 8pm on a Friday and I've already got a guy to tell me how big his penis is. Watched anything good on Netflix lately?
Like wanna sit on your face while you speak German hot
We ended the night eating peanutbutter with our hands and smoking cigarettes in the house at 4am. Fucking Everclear, man.
You know how fear has a smell? Well turns out shame has a smell too. It's Pina colada flavored anal grease.
Randomize
