And then i made him answer questions about me before i took off my clothes
Come 10 years my vagina won't look like this. I must cherish it
We saw a kid playing in poison ivy. We walked away, he'll learn his lesson.
Just saw my bank statement. It literally goes liquor store pizza place liquor store pizza place bar bar bar liquor store pizza place 711 for snacks withdrawl for drugs rinse and repeat
I have yet found the courage to put pants on. No judgement thursday led to no shower friday and now no pants saturday. God i miss college.
I feel awful
Physically or morally
Physically. The only immoral thing I did was steal money from strippers while they gave me lapdances.
I just saw my first passed out person, sprawled out on the sidewalk like they died. I wanted to take a pic but I thought that screamed "tourist"
Who'd have thought a guy with a lisp would be so good with his tongue?
Just checking to make sure you weren't kidnapped, pregnant or watching Fox News.
I was full on naked standing in his room and I just said "this isn't me" and left.
They found you popping and locking it alone in the parking lot
I'm currently trying to figure out a way to fill the bathtub up with mashed potatoes so when he comes over he'll know what's about to hit him..
He wouldn't shut up so I started sending him pictures of animal dicks
The taste of regret at 8am, yup that taste is Jack Daniel's
So much for no-infidelity-fridays....
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