i can smell the iron from margo's period blood from across the table.
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
Nah it's cool, I made him pinky promise me he wouldn't die if I left him passed out in the bathroom.
Drunk Tina signed up to be part of the crew team and got a text from the captain telling her there's practice tomorrow. Wtf
I'd like to thank you fucktards for dumping the WHOLE box of Tricuits in my bed after I passed out.
holy fuck man...it feels like I got beat the fuck out of by death's baseball bat...chimichangas?
I feel like the fact that I slept with someone who dresses up like Batman a few times will never be lived down.
No but I was fuckin done when I realized my acrylic nail caught fire when I was hitting the bong.
it was good, but also weird. like, i came four times and then cried weird.
I need to stop getting picked up at 3 am by my friends parents. This is the second time this week. I'm a grown man.
I was going to learn how to knit but I got high instead.
You can't leave me alone in times of distress because I will fuck things 🙈😐
I just realized. I havent even gotten a paycheck from this new job yet and already laid one of the girls most of the dudes are after
You are cut off. Your giant penis and crazy awesome sex is ruining my body...
It's slightly odd going to a booty call during morning rush hour with everyone else going to work.
Randomize
