Best walk of shame ever. Not only did I not remember his name or the fact that we fucked, they all watched as I tried to get into 3 cars that werent mine
Oh and I threw up on myself...
i woke up naked with 27 half ripped $ bills in my bed from ripping them off the wall of the bar
she has tattoo'd to her hips "grip here" this is why they made spring break
this is hardly the first time i've been told i'm dressed "too suggestively" for 7 in the morning.
when does it stop being whiskey dick and start just being me bad in bed?
her bf's celebrating 10 yrs of service at kfc...it's safe to say all the good men are taken
I just brought the toaster out onto the porch to light a cigarette, don't talk to me about being desperate.
When are you not under some influence?
Since last Tuesday...yesterday.
Come over so we can hookup and eat tacos. Those are 2 things you can't possibly turn down.
I would seriously fuck her so hard, her contacts would pop out of her eyes.
My manager just held my hair while I threw up in a dumpster. New low.
I hope you get a lego stuck in your dickhole
My legs feel like baby dolphins
I’m not closing myself off the to the possibility of making a bad life choice.
What’s the level of adulting when you reschedule a dentist appointment to have a threesome?
Randomize
