So I'm stoned for 420, and have an eye doctor appointment in fifteen minutes
Are your eyes okay
I mean if I was Asian they would be
Ducking stuck downtown...all the fuxkig roads are blixkded
I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
I just had to explain to my father, how having two screens plugged into my computer doesn't use more internet.
I just found 51 cents in my bed. Did you leave me a tip?
I woke up with a flask of whiskey and a mason jar full of sausage in my tux jacket. south georgia is where i belong
No its cool I don't even have to do anything he is rapping to one of the strippers. He is punishing himself enough.
I have no words
Neither did my mom, when she walked in on me squating with my balls in a cup of hot water.
All I could think about when I saw her was that she could be the mother of my future first round draft picks
NO SHITSVILLE I just saw a homeless dude punch a pigeon that flew by him
I'm wearing too many socks to be ok with this.
Just had to kick my 26 yr old boyfriend out of my bed before getting the kids up for school. Have I mentioned being 41 doesn't suck as much as all the hype.
A place where it's acceptable to show body parts is not a good place for me to be.
He yelled "Go Ducks" while he came
Word to the wise, never look up your hot young doctors on Facebook before you're discharged. You will find things and no longer be able to take them seriously.
Randomize
