I'm playing the sound guy on a porno set
Can't remember why I called but it definitely had something to do with Lou Bega
Apparently on the way out of the ER i asked the nurse to doggie-bag me some more morphine.
the point i decided it was time to leave was when i was on the floor of the bar, after taking her down with me, and a table.
I don't know how many crown and cokes he went through but I know it was more that I have fingers. We are never leaving Texas.
Hey. Be honored that I consider you the genital expert. I know alot of candidates for the position.
Found out last night that "Everclear" is Spanish for "shit got weird"...
Well, let's see..I held him while he cried for 30-40 minutes, woke up on his couch AND he gave me a ride home in his underwear. Shit show is not even the half of it.
The Winnie the Pooh costume was great until you got drunk and started yelling at the kids asking for pictures.
Good god you suck at this wake up call. Seriously. If I can, after consuming enough vodka to subdue a russian soldier, muster up enough motivation to call you in the morning and send you naked pictures the least you could do is pick up.
Well he has a golden retriever set as his background so there's no way he was filming us having sex
You know Sunday Funday was a success when 'puke and rally' came at lunchtime on Monday.
Shriek
Don't make me do math I'm drunk and full of chicken
So I have three weeks to get rid of his girlfriend and fuck him senseless before he goes to jail
There is no way entering a gas station bathroom memorializing an alien abduction in rural New Hampshire is a good idea.
Randomize
