She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
it was like she wanted to be a once a week night stand
I just put lube in Matt's bellybutton. He looks unhappy.
The second he texted me with "*dry humps you!*" I knew any relationship we might have had was over.
I'm watching the red sox through my neighbors window from my bathroom. We're winning btw.
Hahaha you puked all over his shirt.
You puked in the planter and everyone saw your snatch.
Well someones bitter they didn't get any.
She's trying to master eating with her feet. She said it was be she "always has to be prepared."
Update: I just puked into a sock. It was the only thing available at the time. Why I happened to be holding a sock, we may never know.
they're both probably 7 inches? or 8? I'm shoving a ruler in my mouth trying to figure it out
So, were they human bite marks at least?
Your guess is as good as mine.
there's cocaine on the ipad again........... was your sister here last night?
she doesn't even know what year it is. She just stumbles around life with a bottle of rum
Fuck you and fuck your stupid hat
I love how u said nothing about the sidewalk sex but refused shower sex
I'm at a Tim Horton's and two girls just came in handcuffed to eachother
Randomize
