so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
so the guy who showed me the apt today is now texting me and asking me out for drinks...he's at least 20 yrs oldr than me and highlights his hair, but part of me is wondering how low i can talk him down in rent during sex? wrong?
conclusion of the day: americans need to get on tredmills, people need to learn how to flush toliets and learn how to pee in then instead of on them, and waiters shouldnt tell their life stories to customers.
so they made cookies with their faces printed on them...I ate jaime...she tasted like poop
I think drunk me is telling hungover me something... I just have to crack the code.
she literally hasn't taken the mardi gras beads off in three days. she showered in them. TWICE.
Can I have my ID back now or are you using it to crossdress again?
Totally just met the chick getting nailed in our lobby last night. Should I bring it up?
when you agree to fuck a guy it does by NO means make it okay for his roommate to hide in the closet with doritos and watch
Well i think matt shit his pants so ill mark that as a W
I am in a hotel room with 10 people. John is in bed eating an industrial sized pan of mashed potatoes. I think a non insignificant number of people saw my nipples.
Literally sucked a dick for ten seconds before I said to myself, this tiny ass penis isn't worth it. My night last night
Everyone is a disappointment when you lose your virginity to nine inches
My mom said "I saw the signs you guys were high, so I made the spaghetti"....so ya, I'd say she definitely knew
Randomize
