this kid down the hall keeps banging on his drums...i feel like i'm living in jumanji
she always made me post sex PB&Js it was like fucking a trashier Martha Stewart
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
I smelled my fingers after she left and they smelt like sugar cookies. I want that one again.
Every time I hit my bowl my neighbors set off fireworks... I stop, they stop. I start again, they start again. Too high for this.
I must say your penis is just as photogenic as you
Shame tastes like burnetts and latex
Do you remember trying to use a pencil, pen, and sunglasses as your second form of ID at the bar when they wouldn't let you in last night?
its official: beach shits are the exact same as mountain shits
I really want to text him and congratulate him on having a bigger penis than the guy I dumped him for, but I thought that might be awkward...
He's like the unplanned child of drunkenness
I'll be home next weekend. Its mothers day. Let's party just enough so we are frightened it might be our first
Wearing my one sleeve dress...thought you'd like to know I shaved ONE armpit lol
I went to steal condoms from your room and all I could find was chik fil a sauce
We free pour in this house. Measuring alcohol is for the weak
Randomize
