He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
Awww. A guy on the train just took his coat off so his girlfriend could throw up into it. Who says chivalry is dead?
Also, I just saw a woman change into her stripper outfit in the bathroom at Target.
Shoot me. Guy hitting on me with a beaver on his head. Says it is his spirit animal.
I only wish the guy being lead around by his cock at the drag show was the weirdest part of my night.
I may or may not be taking a bath listening to the Phantom of the Opera. This lovely moment brought to you by xanax.
She's the drunk girl with the air-horn and sunflower seeds.
She's doing hand stands on the train as I type. Idk if I'm impressed it embarrassed. Or turned on.
He'd rather cuddle with his shitty little miniature dog than the half naked girl in his bed. I've lost all hope for him and my vagina
He yelled "HOO-ah!" like Al Pacino when he pulled down his pants. Trust me, he has every right to.
I never thought the most recent texts on my phone would be with ASAP ferg and my ex...
So I woke up really sad and then I looked in the cabinet and there was weed and now I'm not sad anymore
Russell is lonely. He needs a companion.
You're lucky you have a monster cock or most people may just laugh at your penis' nickname.
I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but yours is no longer the biggest penis I've seen. It is however, still the prettiest.
Found your brother. He was passed out in the tub holding a bottle of Shatto milk wearing nothing but his tighty-whities.
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