Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
Well maybe next time you won't tell me to do whatever I want.
Things found in my vomit last night: cell phone, Von Hayes rookie card, a boot, my dignity
what is the most politically correct way to ask if he still hangs out with the guy that has blue hair and make meth in his car?
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
Successfully masturbated while balancing on an exercise ball. my greatest accomplishment?
Probably
Roomie questionaires don't ask any of the important questions like "how do you feel about one night stands" and "will you judge me post-walk of shame"
I feel so bad for your roommate
What, I can't laugh at my sister being driven crazy by Facebook randomly assigning chat significance to the guy she lost her virginity to?
So my class is approximately two vomits from the bus stop. Happy first day of class
Only a true best friend would remind you to make sure your cucumber dildo is organic
Someone just asked me why I drink so much. Im gonna slap a bitch
someone stole my phone at the bar last night, naturally, it led to me waking up in the bartender’s bed
I walked in describing her boobs thinking I was talking to you only to hear dad say 'I remember when your moms were like that'. ALWAYS tell me when they get home early. Always
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