Rock
Scissors
Fuck
you told all the 17 year old girls at the party that your mating call was "I glitter in the sun"
we were having sex and the sweat made her make up run... seriously laid there and watched her face just melt into ugly.
I take that as "no I'm not driving you to the bar in a blizzard"
I didn't think about how painful the pumpkin seeds coming up the next morning would be. Oh well, I'm good at making pumpkin seeds and that's all that matters.
He knew exactly who I'd slept with after just one look at my crotch. He's like the Sherlock Holmes of cocks.
I think I may have walked up to her while she was with her friends and asked for a "do over".
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
I had sex on a sidewalk in downtown Chicago... I don't think I have anymore morals to lose.
I needed to bring way more fireball to class to match this professors intensity
You wanna know what I want to eat? Questionable Mexican food before I go drink. Makes for excitement. Will I puke it up or shit my pants
Please tell your friend to stop shitting in my closet.
Is it acceptable to pay for WiFi on flights solely for the purpose of getting on Tinder to find a sugar daddy on the plane that doesn’t mind upgrading me to first class?
Do it. You’re flying for two weddings. You’re gonna need that first class.
There are twenty eight units in that building. There has to be at least one heterosexual in it. You can't have fucked your way through all of it.
He had a small dick and screamed "I will kill you if you don't get hard" to it in German...awkward time to have to explain I speak German too...
This is why you need to stop sleeping with freshmen.
Randomize
