No, don't ignore my call, i just need to know, whats cuter a pig in boots or a miniature horse sitting down..
So, how was the dinner
Just like the ex wife, cold, fatty, and expensive.
i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
I put it into a sports analogy for him: there are three teams in the league- friends, fuck buddies, and dating, and the fuck buddies roster is full, pick an alternate team
we had you propped up in a chair and fed you donuts. i've never seen you happier
He made fire alarm noises before throwing up all over the street.
can you come back were all locked out and alyssia's still inside passed out on the floor but more importantly i left a beer in there that's not finished
our relationship was basically a one night stand, with a three week long, morning after
I still can't get over the fact that he thinks I have my life together... That has to be one of the nicest yet most sadly misled things anyone has ever said about me
Dude, i just watched a drag queen dropkick a motherfucker. this is a good night.
Your friends are scaring the cats so I'm going to smoke weed with them to call them down.
Holy shit my cat won't leave the lube alone
Ended up at the strip club, got told I should be a dancer 4 times, got free tacos and my hot TA slide in the dms. How was your night?
We need a rematch, I think my pussy was on vacation the other night.
I miss seeing you
i hope for the sake of your safety you were not with your girlfriend while sending texts like that at 3 am
Randomize
