I have had sex with more partners than how old he is.
She was so high she ate a little piece of weed off her pants and thought it was food.
I decided that not getting a job after college is gods way of telling me I will make a great housewife
I'm taking last night back. It officially didn't happen. Tell your friends.
Look on the bright side. Now you know the number for poison control.
Crumbling up chips, putting them in salsa, eating with spoon. New level of stoner fatassery. Its so genius/delicous i'm not even ashamed
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
My vagina bone hurts from grinding on that dude so hard.
If you can find a Canadian Lesbian to have pity sex with me, let me know.
Chose not to courtesy flush and the CEO huffed the result. I feel powerful.
Great sex, the promise of us mixing our excellent genetics in the future, and access to drugs are mainly what's holding this relationship together at the moment
The only reason I know his name is because we wrote marriage vows in orange crayon on the back of a Walmart receipt.
I didn't know what to say so I just sent him a chicken emoji
Can we smoke pot out of a menorah?
Just found $31 in my desk drawer. In $1's. WTF happened last night?!
Randomize
