Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
your dick doesn't do me any good in arizona
Practice the "sorry I may have given you herpes" conversation with me before I call him and break the news
My cleaning lady just walked in the kitchen and i had a hardcore boner. I dont know what awkward is anymore
Those motion detector trash cans don't work fast enough to catch puke.
K. On the way. I need a drink.
Like a drink drink or like water?
Have we met?
I could tell by the Randy 'Machoman' Savage "hey brother" that you were beyond inebriated
I've awoken at 3am again, in a night terror, just thinking about how big his dick was.
What are you wearing tonight?
The colors of the winddddddd
he said he did everything he could to puke on his nurses because they were doing everything wrong
Thats admirable.
we left the music on while we were fucking. some kanye west song started playing and he started to cry
I'm just gonna wear a long dress with no panties today. My pussy needs a break.
Btw that $18 I gave you to run around outside naked came out of your wallet.
I don't want them thinking I'm like, "Mm, yeah, kitchenware in my ass please."
I’m 37 with a career and a home and yesterday my niece set up Snapchat so I can sext with my 22 year old boyfriend/fuck buddy. Yes. Yes I’d say I need help?
Randomize
