do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
I envy you so much. I get girls who pee on my floor and you get girls who leave in the middle of the night
You said, "can you make out with him for a little bit, I need a break."
My dad just gifted me an alaskan flag he stole from the govenor's mansion. He said it was to hang on the wall at 3316, to start a morning ritual. Then he mimed kegstands and vomiting. Senior year will be epic.
I'm so high I feel like I'm pedaling a bicycle but I'm laying on the couch. My body might be vibrating. I made soup.
I will call him whatever I please, including flaccid dick on forehead guy but not limited to watermelon cunt head.
I've smoked enough weed to put down a pony.
Sunday is the day of rest.
As in, whatever liquor is left after last night, you have to drink the rest.
I woke up to 76 pages of e's, r's, d's, and f's from when I fell asleep for 3 hours on my laptop keyboard trying to write that paper.
He pointed at me, then leaned in and said "shes the best at blow jobs" then chris fist pumped him and said "dude, I know"
I just got stoned alone and repierced my nose. don't ever tell me I'm unaccomplished
I just got stoned by myself and am eating cookies so I'm right there with you
I wrote a pretty good eulogy, too. Motherfucker pastor had no sense of comedic timing.
Why did I wake up next to the fire pit? And who wrapped me up like a burrito?
Jägerbombs. Thank Sara.
She told me to take deeps breaths and I said I said YOU FUCKING TAKE A BREATH CAROL IM SURE IF YOU WERE IN MY POSITION YOU WOULD HAVE OFFED YOURSELF ALREADY and she said my name is Becky 😂
send nudes
from the living room?
Randomize
