you kept yelling something about watching the muppets chirstmas carol and trying to turn the t.v. on with your car keys
Why is the word 'best' written on my chest?!!
He wears a hat. All the time. Even during sex. And I'm okay with that.
Do something fun then. Blow up the house or whatever.
How have you survived this long?
Dumb luck and a deal with the devil.
Hey I came back and we made joints with the breathalyzers the cops left last night.
I learned so much about myself in that shower.
He just said his penis sings like Mariah Carey...Im going with drunken.
direct quote from andrew "you know i can't hear when i drink whiskey"
Boobs are out for the taking
Ive done some fucked up shit, but last night was the first I have Poured milk on anothers mans face in the shower.
He just used the word frick. Is that a possible red flag?
I don't think "growing medical marijuana" is Quite what my Grandfather had in mind when he thought me about gardening as a child
You can either drink his whiskey or be a bitch. Doing both is just mean.
i don't care if you are my best friend. does not give you the right to describe how well my sister gives blowjobs.
how about your cousin?
ready for a night of bad decisions, horrible moral standards, and an unhealthy amount of illegal substances.
Randomize
