can you have the cops turn on the gps locator on my phone...i just woke up in a Hooters uniform and I have no idea where I am...
it was like fucking the hulk in a smartcar
around noonish you got carried out for spitting water and throwing cups at old people...
I'm someone's dream girl. I'm hungover in this guy's bed wearing ONLY a Brian Westbrook jersey. Not the same I was on a date with last night.
She made me cum so hard I couldn't hear for half an hour after
and she was grinding on the wall, purring at guys she liked at the pregame...
It's like my ice maker knows when I wanna get drunk
screw jello shots the kids from the culinary school made pudding shots with 4 loko.
Best oral ever, hands down so to speak. but I'm starting to want to meet that lesbian truck driver he says he's better than. Just for comparison purposes of course.
Would be fun, plus since its in public I'll keep my penis in my pants
Get a piano. I want to have sex on it.
okay - we take $20 and buy each other some 'drink till we puke' clothes from the thrift store.
We need a bunch of roses, some chocolate, 2 cops, a mariachi band, and a thermometer
Now in just stoned listening to my dads philosophical idea about public transit
So the next time I call you and say I'm going to my first strip club because it's christmas eve eve, and have work the next morning, I'd appreciate you stopping me
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