you guys were way drunker than both of me
Bonnaroo quote of the day: "why the fuck am i pregnant?!?!" - exclaimed loudly by random hippie.
well thats why i like him. because he makes you happy. on the other hand i think he masturbates too much while texting you.
I love how its suddenly "not all about sex" now that he can't get it up
she wrote "SORRY" in her vomit and left
It's like I paid NJ Transit $33 to suck his dick and go home. Fuck that.
I couldn't function. I was to the point where I was using a bottle cap as a monocle.
i figure if i show enough tits, no one will notice my eyebrows.
Also, upon examining the photos, I have concluded that you were the sloppiest drunk girl of the night. And that's saying something considering Hurricane Jessica was in town.
Um, It's tempting but I'm not into coke or farmers.
Orgasms and cereal.... that's what life's about.
Did we actually play with swords last night or did I dream that?
She called to tell me she just hooked up with my crush...and that he talked about me...not sure if I should be pissed or excited?
I didn't mean that as an expression. I'm literally asking if you want to watch Netflix and do nothing.
Woke up went to work ate beef after three year hiatus shat my pants went to bed
Randomize
