The worst thing that has ever happened to me happened today. I was taking donations at goodwill and someone donated a clearly used vibrator
she kept yelling 'call me bella'
We couldn't find any ping pong balls, so we used a fishing bobber. Could we be more country?
she told me her two favorite things were grocery stores and dick.
You couldn't find any paper towel to clean up the wine you spilled, so you tried to use her cat.
ooh i remember now. Not very absorbent.
I mean turning down birthday sex is never the answer
well I already know I'm going to hell, at this point it's really go big or go home
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
I wanna get freshman fucked up and do shady things on the last Friday of my youth.
I have a third degree burn on my inner thigh from the blunt dropping on me in the car
Is it unethical to trim my bush hair with the scissors from my office?
I just sent a snapchat of my boobs for Adderall. It's finals season.
You had me at "let me see your balls"
Besides, I'm booked tomorrow. I'm planning on drinking heavily and crying in the bath.
If I could go one week without being called a maneater or a spanish trolip that would be great.
Randomize
