The elaphant ear plant popped a new leaf ! Wahoo !
You discussed the Arab/Israeli conflict with the guy behind the counter at the Kebab shop telling him you supported his people. He was clearly Asian.
We're so high we're finding things in the room to build a submarine with. So far we have two cardboard boxes, a piece of wood, puffy paint, and an empty bottle to use as a periscope.
better question... why wasnt i wearing a cape the previous 20 years of my life???
winter break is gonna be like a weird mixture of rehab fat camp and holiday cheer.
WHY ARE YOU POKING HOLES IN MY 3AM LOGIC?!
Or I could hide in your trunk so you can sneak out of putt putt for sex breaks
THE EAGLE HAS MY PANTIES. I REPEAT. THE FUCKING MASCOT HAS MY PANTIES.
HOLY SHIT. You're my hero.
I successfully navigated a full, lengthy interaction with my dad in which he never asked me if I was freshly baked. 10 points.
WHO GIVES HANDJOBS AT 8 IN THE FUCKING MORNING
danced like there was no tomorrow. surprise. there's a tomorrow
did the thing where I quickly swipe right to every girl on Tinder & matched with my sis. God I hope swiping carelessly is hereditary
Whenever I have a bad day I just look at the negetive pregnancy test I keep in my purse and remind myself things could be alot worse.
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
I would offer you moral support, but I have questionable morals..
Randomize
