We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
I almost hooked up with this girl last night. she had a tattoo of a cardinal next to her cooter. said it reminded her of her grandpa
he proceeded to punch 3 mailboxes in a row and when i asked him why, he said "because they were talking shit"... i need a new boyfriend. and a new life.
So I'm pretty sure when I was giving a Birthday Blow J, he went to grab my boob, but grabbed a fat roll and asked "You're not wearing a bra?"
how are pickles made is in the google history again... why do you always wonder that, and forget the answer?
What's he like?
The usual. Sarcastic, dark, full of fucked up emotional problems that result in fantastic sexual prowess.
He was spoon feeding me wine all night.
Oh my god I peed in a park last night and then tried to set off fireworks with a group of middle-aged men
I know. But whatever I'll just eat cold pizza and play with my cats by candlelight
he kept insisting he didn't have my number, so i called his phone and my number came up as "yeaaaaaaaaah!"
They are going to name an STD after you.
My only contacts are booty calls or the club hockey team.
Leaving Denver airport I just saw a group of young Republicans in matching green T-shirts that said "4/20 Baby!"
I was in line at Panera when I got the pic you sent to your coworker. I just showed your vag to a soccer mom. The vibrator was a nice touch.
Stand and applaud for me. I have successfully masturbated in a Walmart changing room with the door wide open during normal business hours. I lead a very Charmed Life.
Randomize
