What I wanna know is who took a picture eiffel towering her?
I've come to realize that after waking up this morning for work no one wins in bar dice.
I cant do that to my vagina yet. its my prize posession.
okay just a general question, but if i got arrested, who here would bail me out. this is important.
There's a guy in here whose face looks like it would be perfect between my legs.
Well watching will be involved...it'll just most likely be of me licking your penis instead of me trying to understand how Hans Solo goes up against the Galactic Empire...
2 hours later, she made her cat watch the waterfall scene from Homeward Bound to teach her how good she has it here.
I hate how much more visible my vomit is on snow, I need a winter vomit bush
You were talking to yourself and eating cold cuts in the kitchen when I found you
Well you were listening to music and having sex really loudly. How was I supposed to know you'd hear me making rocket sounds?
When Ben was deep throating pickles last night I actually reconsidered our relationship
So... How much of our rent is drug money?
I've faked every orgasm I've ever had, I think I can fake being sick for 8 hours.
Only in the emergency room do they shut the door when youre laughing too hard
Ok here's the plan: birth control, KFC, handcuffs.
Randomize
