Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
I want Jason Statham to talk British to my vagina.
if you think for one second that i'm not using my mittens as hand puppets at the bar tonight then u dont know me at all!
Sometimes I think I have so much sex with you to be sure you're actually straight.
I JUST FOUND AN INTERNATIONAL POLE DANCING CHAMPIONSHIP IN SPANISH
Ok. Here's the plan. Take your hand (whichever is closest), summon all your nerve, and just stick it right down his pants.
I love you.
Oh I know babe. You're shining beacon of adult responsibility. That's why I go down on you.
I go down on you because abs
i projectile vomited shoeless at 7:30 a.m. in a taco bell parking lot. never again.
His dad was on the tv delivering the local 11 o' clock news while we were having sex
Marrying her is the worst scenario of any. That includes death and zombies.
If this gives you any indication of my current state, I stopped at Meijer after work and bought funyuns, pregnancy tests and chocolate.
Sex in a tree, bucket list CHECK!
He ate me out for an eternity. Like fell asleep, woke up, and he was still doing it.
She said if you lived here it would be like the x rated version of 3's company
Whose the chick running for dorm president promising bigger dicks and softer toilet paper? That’s who I m voting for
Randomize
