Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
My entire childhood was an ugly sweater party
Life is so much better when you know you're gonna get laid soon.
well he has a gf so if he picks me up tonight i'll only him finger me
My life is a requiem composed in the key of fuck.
Why do I feel like I'm not the only one drinking to make my night class teacher look better?
OMG. if college stays like this, theres no way i wont be pregnant by first semester
its official: beach shits are the exact same as mountain shits
I just ate powdered extacy out of my wallet. I think I might have for a second of my reasonable life been on your level.
The silhouette of his dick looked like an eagle. Amurrican.
You want to get day drunk this afternoon and watch these guys build a house across the street?
I'm closer to stabbing a fork in my neck than finishing this resume.
Got a minor my first day of college from the bike police. I'm gonna like it here
I may or may not have just let Ash Ketchum capture my wild Pikachu in a parking lot.
She wanted me to stick my dick in the birthday cake she got me
Randomize
