some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
I drove you home. there is no excuse for wrecking your car 3 hours later.
Its a sad day when your bush has a better set of hair than you do
Forever 21 now has a maternity line. Even more of an incentive for me to get pregnant at a young age.
You had me at "you have a nicer rack then her"
In line at the grocery store. The girl ahead of me is in a wetsuit and just bought 3 cases of beer and a bottle of vodka. I want to go where she's going...
Sometimes I send them texts like "I want to make you cry and lick up your tears" just to fuck with them. And THAT is how you get rid of a Stage 5 clinger.
Haha, oh man. I'm awake now. Slept in my headdress.
He called me in the middle of the night to ask my shoe size. Apparently big feet would make me an unsatisfactory third for the threesome.
bought a large fruitopia from McDonalds at 7:45 this morning. Spilled it on the ground. Cried. THAT hungover.
He called me dainty, then fucked me like the Viking God he is.
So our night ended with 6 cruisers, a fire truck, and an ambulance. Also, lots of blood. How was yours?
look im sitting on my bathroom floor in my underwear snorting cocaine can we talk about this later
Why can't he see that I don't want a slow getting to know you period? I just want to bone. NOW.
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