Does boxed wine and camel crushes signify a college date? Lets hope so
You are the sheppard guiding my vagina away from horrible decisions.
I had no idea a 5'8 girl could fit entirely on her knees in front of the passenger seat of a Sunfire, but I am very happy to now have that knowledge.
There's an official council for his ex boyfriends. They told me they 'look forward to the day I join them'.
Just warning you now f you do not get intoxicated with me in front of the family on thanksgiving we are not related.
I'm going to get pregnant and die... Mean Girls warned me about this but I didn't listen
One of us will probably end up wearing nothing but glow/ neon body paint and a pair of water wings...
And I am in no way ashamed to say that it will most likely be me. I'm hoping for it actually.
I just stuck my fingers down her throat so she could puke. I mean what are friends for
Oh my god she just threw up on her dog
I would let Bear Grills repel down a waterfall using my dick if I could go to sleep right now.
Girl, he can't tell you not to take a bump just because you work tomorrow. You're on a wedding diet, remember?
So we became Pizza Strippers- we stripped and asked for slices of pizza in return.
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
She was on top, but I lost her at "alright, you look like predator."
God damn. You sleep with one 40 year old married dude and suddenly you have “daddy issues”. Fuck all of you.
So who has the penis shaped party tray? You or your mom?
Randomize
