Update, blind date is cute and fun.
Scratch that, blind date just threw up.
just upgraded from jello shots to jello bowls blacking out just got that much more delicious
i'm crying at olive garden. i've hit rock bottom
dude, boobs are like the porridge in goldylocks
whatever a "slut portfolio" is, mine is apparently almost complete
I got groped on the dancefloor by both grooms. I love gay weddings
the taxi driver actually pulled over to let us moon a house full of people
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
There are so many birds around me. And squirrels. I feel like that chick from Enchanted...but like if she had a dick and made poor life decisions.
He says he won't get serious until he screws an Asian and a virgin. I should just place an ad on Craig's List
Wanted: female 18-24 of Asian or partial Asian descent to fuck my ginger boyfriend. Must be willing and able to fake virginity. No emotional connection needed, just sex, just once. Further contact post sex not needed (or particularly desired)
I have no idea. But that is beside the point bc in vegas I'm a pro vball player from Ireland and a veterinarian on the weekends
you guys have a strange definition of the word fun. I would have said dangerous, terrifying, or life-threatening. of course, bowling can now be described the same way.
I threw up a lot of peanut butter last night.
He says the sweetest things but also that he wants to choke me when we fuck so it's kinda perfect.
Let's just say, I'm pretty sure you're banned from Skype.... like, forever.
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