I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
You would think that someone would have been sober enough to object to vodka bong races.
The moment that kid turns 18, I will have his sperm for all three meals.
Oh God. You're going to jail
Sunshine is the equivalent of sprinkling whore pellets on campus.
We were tripping too hard to figure out to tell him where we were so we sent a picture of me laying outside the tent saying "find us"
If your plan is to re-bang every girl you banged in high school - you're gonna need a spread sheet and clip board.
So while you were living in this woman's apartment, you acquired a room mate, fucked her daughter, and killed her bunny. Worst sitter ever
She pinched my nipples out of nowhere as I was about to come... I think I found god
New war strategy! The ex-girlfriend of my ex-girlfriend is now my twice a week booty call!
i just hope we're both dead or in prison at the same time
i doubt you are even in possession of a crowbar.
I suggest you not find out the hard way
I think I achieved my goal of being high for 24 hours in the same week I promised myself I wouldn't smoke anymore
still drunk.please come get me.he kicked me out because i couldn't stop laughing about passing out in the middle of taking his virginity.
I could have sworn that I went home last night... but judging from the couch I just woke up on, apparently not.
just passed a kid drinking a beer at 2pm. clearly it's the last day of break.
Randomize
