It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
The Worst (noun)- 1. Getting up at 6am after a night of drinking. 2. Wearing a Peter Rabbit costume.
I was about to watch some really classy porn. Title was ravenous for dick. I didnt know pornstars knew ravenous was a word.
In a world where you don't want your phone to pocket dial your parents at 2 in the morning while you're running around Florida shitfaced, Droid does.
She's an ex-convict. She actually got stabbed in the face with a pen while in prison. No big deal.
Yeah like 200 white people came and they are playing that one Biggie Smalls song everyone knows.
I'm posted up in the bathroom at au bon pain, high as balls, experimenting with eyeshadow combinations and listening to 90s jlo. The girl in the stall next to me just plopped a big one and I laughed, hope I ruined her day
well, obviously he didn't fuck me for my strong moral fiber.
Drunk me forgot I'm not an 18yr old raver anymore. Adult me is now in pain.
Romney sounds like a middle school girl and that creepy ass smile makes me want to close my blinds
I swear to all that is holy, next time you get my mom high with your "special bake sale" I am going to put your dick in the blender.
The strip club incident sums up our friendship pretty well
You offered the police officer a Snickers ice cream bar and cried when he wouldn't take it...
You lost me at unexpected butt stuff. Everything else I would probably do.
I wish I was taller so I could give these boobs the publicity they deserve.
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