Yea, forget your mom. She will be home after her one night stand.
I have a client coming in and there's a note that says she wants her hair to like Elisabeth Hasselback's from the view
that's Oklahoma for you
Making out with married ex girlfriends: priceless
Anthony wouldn't know good sex if it sat on his face
I knew it was gonna be weird when she opened the condom with scissors
Its 4 am and he honestly tried throwing pizza at his ceiling for decorations
Its so hard looking at my mom and pretending I'm not dying a slow death of binge drinking
Semen is not good for contacts.
Step one go to argentina step two fuck bitches it's a simple plan really
But you can still look for dick after you find Jesus.
I just farted in the bathroom and the guy in the stall next to me started gagging. Its a beauitful day
Nothings harder than putting on a frozen condom.. or should I say softer
We're about to play the try not to vom at the president's house game...
It was 3 am when she drunkenly tried to deep-fry a banana.
How'd she do that?
Looking back, we probably shouldn't have chased alcohol with more alcohol
Randomize
