Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
so he stopped for a second, looked up at me and said in a really creepy voice, "I can has cheeseburger?" and then went back to eating me out.
The most interesting things happen to you when your pants come down. I truly envy you.
What makeup look will say to the therapist 'I am a smart, well-adjusted young woman'?
Were playing beruit winners pelt losers with eggs
You're really doing everyone a disservice by wearing pants all the time.
This is one of those times I wish I had a time machine so I could go back and punch myself in the face to make me realize what I need to do before it's too late
He can keep it, but if he asks for anything else i'm just going to start pissing on things.
I mean of all the things to be cockblocked by, Taco Bell is pretty high on the list
Finals week game: One shot for every psychological trauma I've been through that I have to explain in detail. Man I hate my major sometimes.
THE SUPER HOT BARTENDER WHO LOOKS LIKE RYAN GOSLING JUST WALKED IN. BUT HE DOESNT EVEN WALK HE GLIDES. LIKE AN ANGEL.
So... I may have accidentally just sat on a strip of a home waxing kit.. naked... Assistance is definitely needed....
I also need to get my life together but instead I just eat spoonfuls of Nutella. We can't win 'em all
She wore her engagement ring the whole time we fucked. I hate her fiancee, so it was cool
Definitely woke up.this morning to a random girls head in my toilet and her mom knocking on my door.
Randomize
