lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
I just answered "If only I knew" for a quiz in criminology, she loved it. I got an A
She's okay as an interesting car wreck. But as a sexual object she's funny
do you think she knows her nickname is brickface?
People are yelling about how much they want you here.
I'm going to change, vomit up my mexican food to save the trouble later, and then come meet you. Thrilled.
Trust me at the end of the night there will be queso smothered places you didn't think it could be smothered
Went to the elf storage building to help him get his old dresser. Found his brother's stash in the drawer and ended up passed out w him on the mattress in there instead.
After what I experienced at 6am this morning, all I can say is chew your noodles thoroughly.
our jesse-walt dynamic is actualy really perfect because i want to start a small time drug empire and you want to get high a lot its very accurate
fell down stairs ended up in underground bar now im dancing with trannies and best night of my life. lines of coke
Started the 4th with a foursome. I don't know if it gets more festive than that. #MERICA
I told him you're making deviled eggs for the party. Sisters make deviled eggs to get their sisters laid. It's science.
it was weird i started the party in just my underwear and woke up in my clothes
Gotta say, self-deprecating Lord of the Rings-themed sex jokes were not on my agenda for today.
Randomize
