I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
what about "I will fuck you for a jamba juice" do you not understand?
dude i need to stop getting high. i cant afford to eat like this...
Well he told me I'd never be a wizard, and so I responded with you'll never have a big penis. After that we both just sat there and cried.
Aaaaand that would be the most of my hand I've ever fit into a vagina before.
I remember pointing out how smooth my legs were to try to direct his attention away from my vagina.
i was gonna do a lot worse than just throw cat food on you while you were passed out, but then you sleep vomited and i felt a little bad
I know we were going to go hiking today, but I don’t think I can face reality until Wednesday
I washed my sheets. I did out of respect for my previous and current sexual partners.
Would it be creepy if I masturbated with my face in the pillow he slept on last night? Cuz I'm pretty sure that's about to happen
I believe you can. But if you can have rum with breakfast then do that. Definitely do that.
He dropped some cash when he got in my front seat upside down. And a hat. I'm keeping them as retribution for not remembering that he had sex with me once before. Although, if he didn't have his dick pierced, I wouldn't have remembered either.
You sealing the pinky promise with a shot was much better than just kissing it
And I hope you're not misinterpreting us fucking as me trying to win you back. The sex is good and girls have needs.
The weirdest part of it all was wondering if I was going to take off his fanny pack or he was before we fucked
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