He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
So he asked me last night if I would cheer him on while he masturbated...
we got our roommate high for the first time. He went into his room alone and watched Malcolm in the middle for three hours
i can tell by the sound of your bed that he isnt that good at sex.
so when we were booking the hotel and plane tickets for vegas we reserved a chapel for someone, it's inevitable.
I can't believe you're fucking in the bar bathroom, but everyone else can, and they're really proud.
Woke up to a bouquet of flowers in my toilet bowl. Drunk hubby loves me.
I thought stuff was gonna go really bad after he filled the super-soaker with kerosene. but it all turned out pretty well.
Nothing like puking into an empty cooler at a red light on the way to get plan b.
That bitch makes my crazy look like a walk in the park with cotton candy
You kept asking us from the backseat if you were driving ok and then you kept talking to your hiccups and yelling at them to "stop it already!"
Let's just say it was like a porno version of Aladdin....
He thought I was gay. I had to explain I just really like wearing flannel.
It's a special kind of bond when your gay brother takes pics of you topless at a frat party.
Oh, I also stabbed a guy Friday and he still asked me out
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