is hooking up with someone you used to babysit wrong?
Just saw Youth in Revolt. There are only so many times Michael Cera can lose his virginity.
saw a man tazing a raccoon in the middle of the street last night... normal
His concept of male bonding is doing lines in adjacent stalls.
Im sleeping in your bed. Sorry for the sand and the noise and the loud people. Im starving
Your blankets are not drunk friendly
He's cute when he's drunk, too. Also he tried to fight my door...
Hope you had your fill for the summer my friend, because all the cleavage has been put away for the winter. Fear not; it blooms again in May.
Well, when you bump into your parents at a swingers meetup, it's time to change cities
Unfortunately, the Bilbo Baggins adventure side of me that likes to go on adventures appears to be losing to the side of me that likes to smoke weed in the bathtub and watch Workaholics.
Think of something healthy and responsible. Now think of the exact opposite, let's do the latter
you and him went to the park at 2am to "catch a pigeon" and ACTUALLY CAME BACK WITH A PIGEON
Bourbon is too strong for my cat, he does not want to drink it
I realize that my conversation topics seem to only be about bees and my cross dressing fiance. Thank you for being my friend.
So what happened at girls night? My roomate found me passed out locked out on the front steps of the house and it was raining. Yes low moment
I am watching Wayne Gretzky and Alexander oveckhin play video games for charity. What is life right now.
Randomize
