remember facepaint boy? turns out it stains. aaaand i have it all over my face and neck.
I figure if he loans me money i only owe him sex for the rest of the summer before i pay him back, right?
I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
I'm at the store buying plan b and vodka
the cocktail of hope
plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
I finally got her to squirt but it wasnt a stream, it came out in the form of mist. I felt like I was in rainforest cafe.
I didn't realize how much I missed him until his balls were back in my mouth..
He insisted on us having sex while watching the biggest loser and asked me if I could "resist the temptation".
I miss eating meals at a table and having unprotected sex..
Im shrooming at the foot of a tree on top of a mountain. Feeling fly as fuckin socrates and bon iver.
you said you didn't want to carry the pizza box so just folded up the pizza and put it in your pocket
I'm potentially being cockblocked by Old Man Winter. What the fuck did I do to piss off an entire season?
He came back with a Butterfinger and vibrator batteries. There's no refusing him now.
if you're not jumping for joy when you see penis then you're looking at the wrong ones.
Is it wrong for me to wish my cat had arms to get me a beer?
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