is it a bad sign that i now think of my run-ins with cops as "skill building seminars"?
um, yeah. i think it is.
Just realized the hot girl at the office got a boob job over the Holiday.....she is now super-hot girl.
I faked it too. I just spit on your bed.
sex in a ball pit. and I thought ghandi did great things.
someone wrote "the short drunk lives here" on our door. i already have a reputation
he told me not to treat him like a child and then started peeing off the trampoline
she made a facebook for her toddler.. his likes include lil wayne and ice luge. He has more friends than i do. I mean, Seriously? there's not enough booze in the world to make thanksgiveing bearable
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
The point remains that this is the setup for some great stories
Or terrible, horrifying, traumatic experiences
great clearly means different things to us
Today's walk of shame includes last nights hair and make up, an 8 hour shift, me leading a meeting and me throwing up in a parking lot on my way to work. Dear world, you're welcome.
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
I'm making mistakes. Coming up with girl now
I hate me. That girl was hiiiiideous.
What drinking game we play yesterday? Fight club or something?
She forgot a bra so she just used seran wrap. The scary thing is, it worked.
This is your post bachelor party survival text. This a free and complementary service to make sure you are still alive. For alive, say yes. For hurting, say ugh. If lost, say help. If dead, please feel free to not respond. Thank you and we hope you enjoyed the party.
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