And I just threw up at the table during Mother's Day Brunch.
well, tey weren't taking lap dances as payment today
from now on when you get up to pee in the middle of the night, check to see if im sleeping in your parking lot.
i do.
He doesn't like you, he likes u not having a gag relfex
beeferoni + vodka = puke stuck in braces.
I'm doing lines by myself in the kitchen. I think your outside. yeah that's you. your naked.
We didn't even make it to the door before they came out saying we weren't allowed in because of last time..
I will pray to the gods of eye bleach for you
We made a water bong out of a wine bottle... Being an architect major finally payed off.
I'm pretty sure they kept making references about gangbanging me but I was too stoned to catch on, I just sat there and stared at his kitten.
She just shoved like three McNuggets in her mouth and started sobbing and I have no idea what's going on.
I'm sitting in the shotgun seat of my car on full recline trying to pretend everything is ok
All I want is a hot dog on a Saturday at 2:19 is that to much to ask?!
I kind of just assumed by how he whisked eggs that he would be bad in bed.
I've never been so turned off by an omelet.
Through a complicated series of events, I wound up in the desert with a blue chick from comic-con. we lost peter. if you're alive, please come get us.
Randomize
