I am currently prioritizing my hw by splitting into things i can and things i cant do drunk. Oh college
His internet searches, listed chronologically: sex slave, volunteer sex slave, lava
I want to make a porn site called "girls with daddy issues"
We're upstairs smoking....the password is pineapple
He gave Paula abdoul a run for her crazy
I usually just read books and meditate to an aquatic soundtrack of sea walrus's mating. But ill choose coors light instead
I'm sitting on the toilet just to avoid my bosses look of disapproval
Shirtless guy staggering down the sidewalk, puking into a Prada shopping bag. Ahhh, the walk of shame in Boystown.
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
He is really real. Like I know where he works, have referenced him with mutual fb friends and I've seen his dick. He's real.
he cancelled our romantic dinner reservations so we could stay home and watch a Rocky movie marathon and order pizza. i know i should be upset but i think i'm kinda in love.
If I die write a nice eulogy and bury me with my star wars bobbleheads
On the way to have sex with my ex's roommate... I have hit a new low
Where you been?
Please tell me this is a booty call
I thought I was at a rave until the paramedics started chasing me. You win again tequila.
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