so i had sex last night with my 12th partner, but hes number 1 for my first time using a condom. i think im finally learning.
we convinced you the moon was a planet...again
I just got cash back from buying a pregnancy test so that I can buy a case of joose. My life is in shambles.
Maybe someone other than the mad hatter should have gone with him to the ER
He took me by the hand and ordered me to make him vodka soup.. I think I like him?
While I'm on hiatus from the Russian potato nectar, it is my wish for others to enjoy it in my stead.
We were tripping too hard to figure out to tell him where we were so we sent a picture of me laying outside the tent saying "find us"
Yeah then she waddled like a duck in silence sat down and ate the entire paper towel roll.
Guess who just rode home in a cop car?! Your Fav flamingo
When the neighbors threatened to call the cops, he yelled at them that American laws didnt apply to him because he was Danish. He then sang his own version of "America fuck yeah" along to daft punk, then fell down the porch steps. Can we keep him?!?!
Im just confused who has their mom break up with someone
He makes balloon animals that get you high? Hell yeah invite him over!
How have you never felt a dick as hard as mine?
a guy messaged me on POF to ask if I knew of any places that were hiring. And was being completely deadass serious. I'm so done
Sooooo have your ex-girl console you over your ex ex girl that you destroyed said ex-girl over the possibility of
Randomize
