First rule of pills: If you can't remember what it is, take half.
and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
Most of the time people just stick whatever they want in my mouth. Thanks for letting me decide this time
I guess you don't remember pouring tequila in the dog bowl and slurping it.
He tried to make eye contact, he should know by now that freaks me out
Hey! I was tired. I threw up in two parking lots yesterday.
the last call horn was blaring when I tried peeling you off the bathroom floor than you uttered "Ill take the toothless one.'
He put his hand in my cleavage. NOT ON. IN. BETWEEN. NO more gingers
Guy hitting on me at bar is guy who's Craigslist ad we laughed at the other night. Not even kidding.
I remeber being on the roof last night and we put our heads togeather and we touched each others face and said "Hennessyyyy"
I knew my bag made it because I could smell the fireball that spilled inside of my suitcase before it was on the luggage carousel.
You said this was your mistake shot and then vomited on the tv. Never forget.
There is no issue with you seeing me...morally or ethically. we'll update your resume anyway. I really need to have sex with you later. Really
Well as if this year didn't suck enough already, I can now count 2015 as the year I got chlamydia
It does not feel like it was just this morning that I had a penis in multiple cavities of my body
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