do herpes really smell.
The last two calls in my phone are dominos and 911. I'm not sure how my night went.
he's downstairs watching tv with my family... I called the home line so my mom could bring me my make up bag cause my real face would prob make him delete my number
Forever 21 now has a maternity line. Even more of an incentive for me to get pregnant at a young age.
beeferoni + vodka = puke stuck in braces.
why is there cat hair all over my deoderant?
she wanted to smell more freshershest than you.
Naturally, I just peed all over the floor. Two guys in front of me looked at me, but i just shrugged. They won't remember either.
On my list on ridiculous morning after bus rides home, still sopping wet and carrying a giant straw hat is definitely top five
I HAVE MY OWN TITS FOR THAT AND I CAN GUARANTEE THAT THEYRE MORE GLORIOUS
i should do something illegal before my birthday. as of thursday im old enough to go to jail.
What shirt can I wear out that says 'I may have a broken arm, but it's not the one I give handjobs with'?
That freshman kid successfully snuck into a college party, got caught, proceeded to jump out of a second story window without getting a scratch then met up with us a block away and somehow managed to get a bottle of grey goose in the meantime. He is truly blessed by the alcohol gods
I think girls have an advantage in chugging contests. We know how to just open our throats.
So then we ended up at a bar full of navy SEALs and I got one of them to take his shirt off, then I felt him up
I feel like 31-year old me is 21-year old me's hero
Come over so I can fuck you louder than her country music
Randomize
