she was screaming in french about how classy it was to be drinking wine. oh... she was drinking it out of the bottle. with a beer in her other hand while throwing up.
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
Somebody started a fire in the kitchen. I puked on it till it went out. The firemen high fived me.
but then the words kidney pain and possible testicle shrinkage kept ringing in my head
Get caught with marijuana. Cop takes piece. Buy new bong. Circle of fun.
Man, only now that I'm single is it painfully obvious that I have zero booty calls in waiting. This could be a cold winter
It's time for everyone's favorite Wednesday night game... WHEEL OF. VODKA!!!!!
We 6 way cheers-ed with French fries last night, hammered, in the booth.
She came to class yesterday wearing a shirt saying Maybe Partying Will Help. Showed up to class today and puked three times.
I picked up the bartender so he could open the bar early and ended up with him giving me a ride home when he closed. I like snowdays and everything, but they get really expensive. Also, I think I threw up on his front door. Not checking.
so in other words, they broke and fell off and I ate a gummy life saver off of his balls
he fell asleep naked and all I'm doing is staring at his weird balls
It stopped being casual for me when I waxed my vagina for you
His dick has the same name as my pipe. I'm keeping him forever.
Dear god my vagina.
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