the only girl from my high schools graduating class coming to our school next year went stag to prom and still has braces...
dibs.
Instead of asking if I had a condom she literally said " I'm not on the pill but I'm pro choice... your move"... I'm in love
Yeah, you spent an hour in front of the mirror trying to reenact the Sailor Moon theme song.
there's nothing like that first "just failed out of my program" beer
why is pumping your own stomach in your searches on youtube?
If a Romanian girl's marriage isn't considered legal in the US then she's fair game right?
If you're going to outback I'll have to decline, I've slept with a large enough portion of their staff already.
I just had to download an app to edit pictures on my new phone. The things I do for sexting...
she walked out and i tried to get her to come back but i couldn't remember her name so i just whistled... future reference: that doesn't work
We left your bucket of puke on your doorstep to clean out yourself. You're welcome.
And now thanks to shrooms we all got a terrifying glimpse of what goes on in his head. I will not say I didn't see it coming when it turns out he made a suit out of people's skin
I'm concerned that this blind man on the bus has a boner right now
BTW car sex works all the muscle groups. Just sayin. Legs/butt are sore as are arms, back and core.
ETSY JUST SENT ME AN EMAIL WITH THE SUBJECT "SUMER ROMANCE" I'M BEYOND FUCKING DONE
How bad was it?
Stopped drinking Sunday, hungover on Tuesday bad.
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