ahhh, you guys look like a cute little family in the cop car!
stuffed animals make me feel really maternal.
Someone just pulled taco bell tacos out of their purse in class....2 problems with here. 1) this class is nutrition 2) taco bell is not open this early.
I just used my thong as a hair tie. I think I reached my limit.
It's totally ok to sleep with him. The only place I have feelings for him is in my vagina.
I should have questioned it early on when they said bring beer and chocolate syrup
Indoor beer darts at Rafs just turned into a trust exercise of putting your hand on the wall and closing your eyes while the other throws.. Almost gave Cale a Tracheotomy
And I'd make him talk dirty to me. In Forrest Gump's voice.
I saw a kid peeing outback so I yelled "you have a small pecker, but its ok cuz when life gives you lemons..." and proceeded to throw lemons at him
I'm crying at a bar by myself drinking a pear martini drawing things dicks are scared of. How was your day?
HIS NAME IN MY PHONE IS JOSHUA DREAMCHASER I CAN NOT
NO SHAME NOVEMBER
i just got drunk and created an entire Dr Seuss unit for my first graders.
He started planning our future mid-hookup. You tell me how my night was.
I banged a marine last night. No wonder everybody respects them.
Right before he dumped me... he got a really ugly pair of pants. They were twill pants. A pinkish color. When I'm sad... I picture him in them. It makes me smile.
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