I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
That bus ride was like a tour of all the bushes I puked behind last night
Ever had blood in your semen? I am guessing that's a problem.
All I heard was "You have collect call from Lafayette Parish Jail for Dude it was awesome! I'll tell you about it later!"
btw i have an angry voicemail of you yelling at me to get you a sandwich or die.
I had to do a class evaluation today & the girl beside me didn't fill in any bubbles she just wrote in huge letters RETIRE across the whole sheet
Just saw a dude walk out of the parking. Garage in a diaper and tutu. He had a handle in one hand and a toy bow in the other
LOL its 11 am
Seriously, fuck work.
uh yea I'm curled up in the trunk of my car
I told you when I started the only reason I was gonna coach your kids soccer team was that I could meet all the hot soccer moms. So why are you so mad I slept with your ex?
Last night was incredible. I can tell by the nacho cheese on my jacket
I don't think it counts as a booty call at 6:30 pm.
Someone who makes you cum so hard that you have an asthma attack is clearly your soulmate
we've talked on the toilet we're linked now
Naptime over. I've got fresh contacts and tequila. RAAAAAAGE!
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