have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
what are you wearing?
Just my guilt
im pretty sure i just dented her unborn child.
its 9am. i just got home. spent 6 hours blowing him in a closet last night
He just randomly started talking about Haiti and Conan O'Brien and his grandpa's hip replacement operation. It was the worst phone sex I've ever had.
i just bought weed at the top of a mountain, best decision of our lives to go to school in colorado.
I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
it was like getting a handjob from robocop
There where 3 half naked girls passed out on the pool table, I crawled under it and just as I was about to go to sleep some guy walks up and says: "dude nice spot" walks away and comes back with a pillow.
You know how hard it is to play cool while not drowning and appreciating a pair of butts at the same time?
Your roommate from freshman year just had a baby. I think you're winning. Hooray for fifth year seniors!
Vagic. Defined as a kind of magic one has over a girl's vagina. Used in a sentence... he's an accomplished vagician.
i have achieved a new state of being which requires no food or water but is sustained only by coffee and pure, unrelenting rage
So, I had a dream last night that involved you as an actual cloaked Captain America and a lot of weird sex, and I didn't hate it.
Simple revenge plan: break into his house and steal one shoe of every pair
Randomize
