No, I'm talking to this Chinese girl. Can't understand a word she's saying, but i think i caught the word vagina a few times.
Then you jumped off your bed with your arms outstretched, yelled "I'm Goliath, watch out New York!" and then began singing the Gargoyles theme song as you 'soared' around your room.
Don't be ridiculous, the Gargoyles theme song has no words. How could I sing that mess?
You just started going "da da da da da! da da da da da! DA DA!!" then going "swoosh" as you glided about.
I mixed the ketchup wit the mustard in one bottle to save time making hotdogs
hows that letter of apology to the waitress at waffle house coming?
We found your brother, passed out, floating in our pool, with a bottle, on a blow up mattress. How did he mange to walk 2 blocks and get into our backyard?
Alone. In an inflatable pool. Drinking vodka and raspberry lemonade. I don't need approval as much as I need to know you love me still.
Until last night, I had never actually thrown up ON a sandwich
I can only only sleep there on nights I orgasm cause he snores so loud and if he leaves me hanging one more time ill probably cut off his dick from lack of sleep and frustration
He simply fell in the fire, rolled out and continued to finish his bottle of vodka. Everyone else instantly sobered up just watching it.
I fell asleep on the floor again. i dont want help, just a pillow. its kind of nice down here.
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
Her neighbors? They're nice. Young family. Tried not to get puke on their side of the lawn.
Nothing like putting a Percocet up your nose because you spent your night drinking heavily and can't drink water to make you heavily reconsider your life choices
My vagina just clenched in fear
if wiping your ass w an envelope isnt the definition of hitting "financial rock bottom " then nothing is!
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